Thursday, April 30, 2009

The Car Whispering.....


Hello. I am a Saturn SL1 and I recently came to live at Chani's house. From my understanding (and don't expect much understanding from something named after a freezing cold, very distant planet) I am supposed to cart her around and take her where she wants to go. That sounds like a fine idea since that's what I am made to do but I won't be doing that until she fixes me. There are a few things wrong and I hurt a bit on the passenger side but it's nothing serious. Just like you humans, sometimes our joints get old and don't work so well but I'm going to get a new joint and be back in shape very soon.

What can I say? I was cheap, a good deal. All I require is a little bit of aftercare.

She likes me okay and that's what matters most. We Saturns are very vain. We want to be liked.

As one of my new and very strange duties, I'm writing for her because there's still a lot going on at her house. Again, nothing serious but just a lot of petty stuff. Believe me, sitting here in the carport, I hear it all! I think I've come to live at Dysfunction Junction! What a strange bunch of people. Putting up with humans is just part of my car-ma but let me tell you something. You're all very weird!

And then there's that darn Infiniti but we won't talk about that! If it could, it would probably stick its nose up at me. Hey, it sucks gas and gets dirty ~ just like me!

I'll tell you all the secrets one day. Meanwhile, I think I'll go drink up all my gas and see how she likes that! Did I mention that I'm passive-aggressive? Well, see how you would like having to live in a carport! It's cold out here. And when it's not cold, it's hot. And people come by and pull at my door handles to see if they can get in and steal my radio. Sheesh! It's not fun living out here.

She'll be back soon but wanted to introduce me since the lack of me was a large part of what's consumed so much time.



~*

20 comments:

Laurie said...

I just don't know what to day...this hilarious post caught me quite off guard. :-)

Ruth Hull Chatlien said...

Welcome, Saturn. I know Miss Chani will be glad to have you around.

Great post. I especially loved car-ma.

Suki said...

Oh, that was so very cute! Hi, Saturn, nice to meet you! May you and Chani share good car-ma for the rest of your lives together.

Never knew you could write such funny and cute things, Chani :)

Olivia said...

I am so happy for you, Chani. Now all we need is a name. Wishing you more good car-ma, O xo

flutter said...

well nice to meet you, Saturn you are lovely!

heartinsanfrancisco said...

Dear Saturn,

I do hope your car-ma improves soon. A climate controlled garage would be perfect. You should know that Chani looked at four million cars before she chose you, so you must be very special and I know she will take excellent care of you.

As her friend, I'm very happy that you are in her life because now she will be able to leave that dysfunctional place sooner.

I wish you all the best in your new in-car-nation.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

P.S. You write really well for a Tennessean -- I mean, CAR.

LittlePea said...

Yay! Take care of our Chani, Saturn.

meno said...

Chani gets silly! I love it.

Ian said...

The Saturn is at least one North American automotive success story. Happy motoring.

Woman in a Window said...

Secrets. Spill the secrets, Saturn.

(Glad you've got wheels, Chani!)

Leann said...

You live up to your reputation in safety dear Saturn and keep our Chani safe from harm.

Can't wait to hear the secrets you possess!!

painted maypole said...

i hope you are good to Chani. She needs a reliable car.

citizen of the world said...

Yay ! A new car for Chani!

Angela said...

Well, Saturn, what is your name? Please take good care of Chani as ya'll toodle around; she's important to us so be very good to her, you here? :)

hele said...

yeah! awesome to meet you :)

tell chani I say hi and you better look after her well.

ConverseMomma said...

If my car could talk, it would complain that it hasn't been cleaned since Christmas time. Yikes!

Leann said...

Haven't heard from you in awhile so hope all is well with you

Leann

Lex said...

Pleased to make your acquaintance, Saturn. I hope you guest post for Chani again soon. I'd love to hear the secrets!

meetmahima said...

lol chani! this post was fabulous!p.s. welcome saturn