So... I know Sunday's post wasn't an easy one to read for many people.
Growth isn't always cheery and light, filled with sunshiny epiphanies. Sometimes it's really hard work.
But that led me to think about something entirely unrelated but correlated.
How risky are you willing to get on your site?
For this one, I find I'm willing to go far out on the limb, almost to the point of breaking it. This site is primarily about ideas and spiritual experiences, some of which are difficult. In general, I'm very willing to be open. At the same time, there are some things that are entirely off-limits. Some of the things I write about are tempered, some are strongly edited, some are a blatant tossing of the fish on the table. I never write with the intention of offending, while knowing some topics hold that potential.
I'm certainly willing to risk if it plants one seed, causes someone to give some thought to something they perhaps hadn't thought about before from a given perspective - or when it comes to a social justice issue that needs attention, even if the hammer pounds a bit hard. That's something that comes naturally from having written an editorial column in the past. I'm willing to take a poke at some sacred cows on occasion.
So... how about you?
~*
Monday, August 25, 2008
Risky Business....
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23 comments:
as I grow in confidence, I am willing to take more risks-the messy and imperfect post and the church post were both risks for me-stepping out on the limb.
maybe I'll continue to take more, maybe I am good where I'm at...I think it will unfold naturally.
now some things are completely off limits-like diving too deeply into mine and my husband's relationship.
as I grow in confidence, I am willing to take more risks-the messy and imperfect post and the church post were both risks for me-stepping out on the limb.
maybe I'll continue to take more, maybe I am good where I'm at...I think it will unfold naturally.
now some things are completely off limits-like diving too deeply into mine and my husband's relationship.
by nature I tend to share a lot, maybe too much, especially that of an extremely personal nature. I also have no qualms "rocking the boat" on topics that are controversial. There are a few things that are off-limits but not because I personally don't want to delve into it but out of respect for those close to me that might not want such things shared.
Right now I'm pretty chicken about what i say on the blog, usually much more frank on someone else's comment space. Which is possibly why my blog has degenerated into a rather frivolous space... I'm not sure when I'll be able to put more of myself out there again.
the thing I worry about most is someone I know finding my blog and being offended, so I am careful in the risks I take when speaking of others. I'm trying to figure out how to settle in to the fact that my inlaws have found my blog and now read it, although they have never spoken to me about it. Mainly, I try to keep in mind that friends, family and people from my church may find my blog. I don't mind if it causes a bit of a stir, but I don't want someone to read it and be alienated or angry. There's no way to have discussion then.
I'm with the rest, it seems: writing about real life requires that care be taken not to offend those nearest and dearest.
I write about things that feel risky sometimes like my husband's AD, my religious views, issues I have with the dominant culture in this country although not as often or as intensely as you do, cultural cruelty, animal abuse and bigotry of all kinds.
I don't write about my children's lives or those of other family members and close friends. Or issues related to sex. I do not have advertising on my site nor will I ever ask for money. But sacred cows? They just invite poking as long as I avoid calling them names.
I find myself saying little these days but its got more to do with my words having dried up for now.
I draw the line at sharing personal details about those close to me.
Your words reflect your journey - a journey of courage and honesty.
I'm too worried about hurting people, I think. I'm a lot more reserved on my blog than I am in person. My blog is for fun really. I mean I try to share the best part of myself for the most part. I'm pretty open and honest about myself but I don't really talk too much about the people close to me or what's truly on my mind at the moment because I don't like to hurt people. This is difficult for me because I like truth and openness, I don't believe in covering up the dark things. In person I can, without batting an eye, tell my deepest secrets but my blog is too "known" to the people in my life to able to share everything. I keep thinking one day I will start a new one just so I don't have to worry about stepping on anyone's foot but for now I'm content with it...the rest can go in my private diary.
But for thought inspiration---well that's what I come here for! :O)
I loved loved loved your last post by the way. It's something I've been working towards lately.
I have several things that I put off limits. One area is difficulties with my family. It can only be a one-sided conversation and I don't have any relationships where that would be fair.
Another area is certain aspects of religion. Many of my students are very religious and very Church-involved. I don't want to offend them or turn them off from listening to me as a teacher (during which we are speaking about other things entirely).
I guess, other than those areas, I try to be pretty open, but my blog is bloglite compared to your blog. I come here to stretch and think. My own blog is more of a catharsis for some creative energy.
What a good post... Thank you.
I have gone pretty far out there, but it did not happen right away. I have spoken about my abuse as a child, but not in complete detail. I write about my faith journey, complete with all appropriate reverence and irreverence.
Still there are many things, held secret in my heart. They will come out one day...
I tend to overshare, but there are things I will never talk about on-blog.
I will never talk about politics, I will never talk about the adoption and I will never talk about fights I have with my sig other.
ah. great post yesterday too, just catching up now from the weekend mayhem!
i find i am willing to risk some things, social issues, politics, etc but shy away at others, but am not clear if it's a comfort level or a need to share sort of balance i am gravitating towards.
i can't really risk much on my blog, which is a source of sadness for me.
both my mother and father read it.
not only can they not stand each other, but they are both incredibly difficult people.
i want so much to write about them both.
but i can't, unless i start another (private) blog.
however, i DO take risks on the blog as far as sharing my political views.
Award for you at my space :)
Chani,
I will take some risks in my blog, but not disclose things which I would feel violate the privacy of someone else.
Also I am keenly aware of my readers, and tend to be more open on others' comment spaces too. My estranged bio-family reads my blog, as well as a wide assortment of other people in my non-virtual life. I have to want to share things with everyone.
I think your blog is perfect, and the hammer isn't really hard, just honest.
Aloha,
O
Just wanted to stop by and say hi, Chani. As always, your blog is deep and thought provoking. Sometimes I think I got a little too risky on my previous blog - am working on a new one - albeit very slowly. Everytime I come here and read you, it encourages me to get going again. Thank you.
I think I'm pretty open. A lot of my readers comment that they are surprised by my frankness.
One thing I do try to avoid is the "I'm so right and so-and-so was so wrong" kind of post because it's not fair to the other person.
Im the type of person who worries, almost to a fault, about what other people think of me, if they like me, or if I've made them mad. It would very difficult for me to purposefully poke the bear. I know, sometimes I may offend unintentionally, but I try to keep in mind that if that does happen, it's their baggage not mine.
So, yeah, I tend to keep my post pretty safe, and the only bear I regularly poke is me.
I'm not as risky as I'd like to be... There are parts of my relationship with S that I'd love to write about, but don't out of respect for his privacy. And some parts of me that are more "against the grain", I tend to not share because my uncle and grandfather and parents occasionally read. I like them to have the image that I'm sweet and innocent because *mostly* I am :)
I can't help myself. I find i have to be honest, or why bother? Sometimes that means not being all shiny and warm. Life is not always shiny and warm.
How do you quantify risk? I have become more open over the time I've been blogging, and yet I also mask location and do not use names. But it's a measured openess - I am selectively revealing.
I don't think I take any real risks on my blog. There are so many areas that are absolutely or mostly off-limits. Though recently, I've been considering changing that a little.
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