Thursday, October 19, 2006

A little bit of this and a little bit of that....


Here's a snippet of a poem I remembered today while walking. It is a particularly beautiful poem by Emily Dickenson. It is times like this I'm grateful for those teachers in high school who forced us to memorize.


I died for beauty, but was scarce
Adjusted in the tomb,
When one who died for truth was lain
In an adjoining room.

He questioned softly why I failed?
"For beauty," I replied.
"And I for truth, -the two are one;
We brethren are," he said.

And so, as kinsmen met a night,
We talked between the rooms,
Until the moss had reached our lips,
And covered up our names.

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Today seems to mark the beginning of nearly endless political ads on TV. Since I am in California, it's all about Angelides v. Schwartzenegger, Jerry Brown (remember him?) for Attorney General and his opponent whose name I can't recall plus a variety of statements about the many initiatives and issues being presented to the voters. The commonality in these ads is that not a single one made statements about the beliefs of the candidate in question or what he/she wants to accomplish. They all indicted their opponent with hyperbole, sarcasm, and accusation. Just once, I would like to hear them state their own positions in clear English and let the voters decide that way instead of demonizing the person running against them.

I must admit the entire concept of these horse races seems odd to me but that is an issue for another day.

People who know me can tell you that "Peace" is how I always sign off my emails. That isn't a trite or cutesy phrase, just to make me different, cool or like a 60s throwback. My mother could tell you I've been signing cards and letters that way since I was sixteen years old. I meant it then ~ and I mean it now. It is the highest value, the highest accomplishment we can achieve as a species. Maybe what we should be talking about, instead of having horse races, is how we can learn to cooperate with the other nations of the world and bring it about, once and for all.

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I am not a prideful or self-involved person but I'm not going to turn away a compliment, either. Today I had to attend an appointment and decided to call a friend to meet for lunch. The appointment went well and I hurried over to the deli where I anticipated meeting my friend. She was a few minutes late so I got a table and told the attendant that my friend would be arriving, she's tall, heavyset with red hair ~ will you please send her my way? He responded that he would watch for her. With my limited eyesight, I would surely miss her.

A woman sat in the next booth, reading a book. She looked to be my age or perhaps a bit older. She had the look of someone who has lived a hard life, certainly not one who is pampered. She was peacefully enjoying her lunch out. She didn't have a companion. Due to the set up of the restaurant, we were able to see each other. When she looked up and in my direction, I greeted her. Not such a big thing. Really. But, we never know how much someone else might appreciate something so small. I can remember plenty of times when something so simple brightened my day a bit.

My friend came and we began talking, ordering our food and our conversation flowed easily like a river, one topic to another, one memory to another, skipping over rocks and miles and years. The woman next to us got up to leave, looked in our direction and gave her a half-wave and wished her a pleasant afternoon. She stood for a minute and said, "I just want to tell you that you look really cute. You have a good afternoon, too."

For some reason, I so enjoy it when someone tells me I look nice. I am not a physically attractive woman particularly. Sort of okay. I don't mean to insult my parents but I'm very ordinary. My clothes are distinctive and unique. People most often notice that. This is new for me, being willing to "stand out" in any regard. I spent lifetime devoted to being as invisible as humanly possible. It never felt safe to be noticed. Being noticed placed demands on me that I couldn't meet. It feels safe standing out a little bit now. That's new. It's funny how we heal in little ways. The majority of my life, I've been terrified of being noticed. Now it is a positive thing. Who'da thunk it? Life just gets stranger every day!

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Today is my brother's 58th birthday. Happy belly button day, Brotherperson. Amazing we survived this long, isn't it? Another for the "who'da thunk it" file.

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A note on comments: I want to thank everyone who has left me comments. Your feedback means a lot and often gives me something to new to think about. So... thanks!


May all have a sparkling moment very soon, the kind of brings the sun from behind the clouds.



Thailand Gal

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