Weekend Chatter.....

I've made the decision to surround myself with positive books and positive thoughts for a while. This is like anything else. It's a habit. Thinking negatively and my own personal downfall, cynicism, takes a deliberate effort to change.

I ordered a few books this morning based on the recommendations of Olivia at Happy Luau. Any of you who have not visited her blog, please do. She is someone whose thoughts resonate very well with my own - but she has the added advantage of being good at translating motivation to action which is not one of my finer honed skills.

So I am following her lead on the books. I've ordered "The Yoga of Eating" and "The Ascent of Humanity", the latter of which I suspect more succinctly says what I've been trying to say on this site for the past seventeen months. The difference of course is that Charles Eisenstein is an educated, clear thinker where I am tangential.

This changing.. this changing our thinking.. I've never believed is a matter of simply choosing to do it differently. It's a process of education, of learning. We have to learn to think differently. Saying "I refuse these thoughts" is useless unless we replace it with something else.

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On another issue, I was reading a blog this morning that seems to be promoting bigotry. She says (the only reason I am linking is for verification, not because I want to give her the link or unknowingly promote her blog.) that learning to say (and teaching others to say) "I hate fat people" will be one way to discourage people from eating too much, from getting fat to begin with. I find that manner of thinking to be small-minded and utterly hateful. In a way that is not typical of me, I left a snarky comment.

It wasn't anonymous. I own the comment and am willing to defend it.

The dialogue continues. Please feel free to come by and join. It could get interesting.. but please be nice. :)

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There are a lot of people who believe that shaming works, that we can shame people into changing patterns or doing things differently. Shame and fear. "I better not be fat because people will hate me and I'll be shunned" is very different than "I don't want to be fat because I respect my body and my life. I want to be healthy."

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So.. what do you do to stay positive?



~Chani

Fat, fat, fat.....

Okay. I'm still dealing with weight loss stuff.

I'm bored with it. By now, I should be so thin that slipping through a keyhole shouldn't be a problem. I should be non-existent!

When I was over there in the place that shall not be mentioned, I was beginning to lose pounds. Even though I just looked like a smaller pear instead of a big one, it was progress. We lived largely on a diet of rice and vegetables, rice and fruit and occasional meat dishes from the local food stalls. We drank lots of tea and water. I never felt hungry or deprived. Occasionally, I'd have a diet coke but it wasn't every day.

So... being a reasonably intelligent person, you'd think I'd be smart enough to continue that here. Right? And I have. To a degree.

But I'm munching again. Yesterday, I plowed through an unseemly number of crackers and onion dip. I drank diet Coke all day.

It didn't take long for the emotional eating to start again. This is my greatest downfall. I have an addictive personality and I replaced booze with food. The problem is that I can't choose to stop eating the way I chose to stop drinking.

As of today, no more Diet Coke and no more coffee. I'll go back to tea, rice and vegetables, rice and fruit and an occasional meat dish from... well.. somewhere.

So.. again.. today... no more. That's it. I'm going to lose this weight if it kills me... which it very well might.

If I can quit drinking, I can quit this. Right?

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