Oh my gosh, I'm on dial-up!

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Comcast finally came around yesterday and refused to configure my Linksys. Never one to be thwarted, I am using my back-up Earthlink dial-up account. To say it's slow would be the understatement of the century so my posts might be rather bland until I'm up and running again on something faster.

Meanwhile, it's rainy and cold today so I'm cozy in my chair, watching The African Queen for the five-hundredth time! Charlie and Rosie are good company. There's a line-up of movies over the next few days that will definitely keep me under this lap blanket, tea in hand... watching and watching.

These sort of things really delight me, although I'd imagine it would be boring to anyone else. I don't require much to be content these days. Just a good movie, a good book, something decent to eat and occasional company.

In this case, the timing is well - because in addition to being stuck on dial-up, I've got an ear infection to beat all ear infections. It's like being in an abandoned mine. Makes me grateful to not be a canary.

I'll be back in a few days, hopefully with something a bit faster than dial-up and something worth reading. Hope you all have a good holiday - if that's what you're going to be doing. If not, I hope you have a peaceful day.






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Weekend: Just a Bunch of Random Stuff.....

Does anyone like the lampshade in that picture above? I used to hand make those in the 80s and still have a bunch of them around the house. Arthritis has taken over my fingers too much to make them now ~ but I certainly did like doing it.

How about that interview with Sarah Palin and Charlie Gibson? There's something to be said for research and a comprehensive understanding of world and domestic politics. She seems to lack both. She didn't know what "the Bush Doctrine" is! She can receive all the briefings in the world for now - but if she doesn't have a context to put it in, she'll just keep flubbing up.

Last night, a friend and I went to Chipotle for dinner. Not too impressive overall but the conversation was reasonably good. As usual, we talked about religion most of the evening. Even when we disagree, we're fairly good about staying balanced with it - and it's a welcome refuge to spend four or five hours with someone who shares my cultural point of view.

Chipotle though. We won't go again. In general, I don't like "order it here and pick it up over there" restaurants but especially didn't like that they asked my name when I ordered and then handed me a little flashing gadget that beeped loudly when my food was done. The food was okay but nothing exciting and I really didn't like that beeping thing - or being asked to identify myself in a fast food joint.

Meh~

I like my anonymity.

It's finally cooling down! It was cool enough last night for a light jacket. Not being a hot weather person, this is my season coming up.

Now I have to order more clothes. It takes weeks for them to get here. Which card should I max out this time? Citibank or Wamu?

Okay. So all of this is totally random, irrelevant and insignificant flotsam. That happens sometimes. Even around here. :)

One more thing: Perhaps a bit sensitive but not intended to be offensive or confrontative. There are two of my favorite sites that I can no longer visit because of the page loads. Sure, I can rezd them in Google Reader but I can't comment - and there's just no pleasure in it without being able to comment. The loads are very, very slow and all the ads have to load in before I can see the text. The ads bounce and some of them are actual videos. I like y'all - but don't like being marketed to so aggressively. I want to read what you have to say but that's the operative phrase: what you have to say ~ so you might want to check your page load and make sure people can get in. If any of you want to know from me whether your page load is too long, leave a note and I will tell you privately. Thanks. :)

Hope everyone has a peaceful weekend.


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Into The Wild.....

I know I haven't had much to say here lately. There are reasons for that and I'd rather not go into all the specific reasons - but I've had some internal work to do that shouldn't involve others. So I filled this space with quotes and impersonal exercise ideas. It's just something very hard to communicate and I chose to silence myself.

One of the changes I've made here is to delete my sitemeter. It was depressing me. I will not be able to visit new visitors now unless you say something. I will have no way of knowing you were here. I miss a lot of the people who no longer drop by but know there is nothing I can do about that.

I've been watching movies. Yesterday I watched an interesting one that raised some interesting points as well as emphasizing some important truths.

It is called "Into The Wild" and involves a young man who decides to remove himself from the craziness of the world and go into the wilds of Alaska. He left after having graduated from college, wanting to avoid the typical mainstream traps of career and family.

Along the way, he met several people, all of whom seemed to like him very much. It didn't mean much to him which is incomprehensible to me since I am somewhat socially dependent. He enjoyed their company in the moment and moved on freely, no regrets. This isn't to say he was a "user" of others in any malignant way. He simply chose not to attach. At one point, he said "I think people make a mistake when they say the only meaning of life is in human relationships."

He continues to retreat more and more. He eventually ends up living in an abandoned bus in Alaska.

I don't want to ruin the movie for anyone who hasn't seen it, but it did raise some interesting thoughts.

Is choosing not to attach the healthiest way to go?

I think he discovered that it is not. See the movie to get a sense of his final discovery. I will say here that the final entry in his journal said "Happiness is only real when it is shared."

Being one who used to believe it didn't matter, I've also discovered that it does. That is why I am putting more energy into finding local people to be involved with. One of my new activities is at the local Lao wat. (Yeah, it's not Thai - but any port in a storm! The traditions are similar.) They seem to be very nice people and it is a wonderful feeling to be around the happiness of others once again. My next trip out will be at the beginning of April for some weekend activities they are hosting.

This seems to be a logical step. While my ultimate goal is, of course, to go to Thailand, I am here for now and am not ashamed to admit that I need companionship. Ever since I came back from Thailand, I've been acutely aware of how lonely I've allowed myself to become.

And, yes, I allowed it. It doesn't happen outside of me. I've allowed it to go on way too long and get far too deep.

So I won't be around here as much. But I'm not going away entirely. Not at this point. I will only make that choice if everyone ultimately completely loses interest in me.

See you in a few days. May everyone be well and happy.

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