Limits to Unconditional Love...

This morning, I've been thinking about unconditional love. There are two news stories that triggered this off.

Bobby Cutts, a married police officer, killed his pregnant girlfriend. A high school friend, Myisha Ferrell, may have helped him dispose of the body ~ or at the minimum, helped him to cover up the crime.

In the later years of my generation, some group of academics came up with the idea that we should all love each other unconditionally. No matter what the behavior, we should stand by our friends and our families.

No limits.

Personally, I've never bought into the concept of unconditional love. I believe behavior has a lot to do with my feelings about someone. Maybe I'm just missing something, but if you kill your girlfriend, you're on your own. I will not help you dispose of the body and I will not help you cover it up, even if I think you are the nicest person I've ever met. Even if you tell me it was an accident and you didn't mean to do it. You do it. You own it.

Paris Hilton's parents are planning a big party for her when she is released from jail today or tomorrow. Kathy Hilton still claims that Paris' jail term was "unfair".

While I think it's obvious that her parents are trying to make money off of her, I can't help but wonder how that girl was raised. Was she constantly told "you're special", "everything you do is okay", "we will stand by you, no matter what you do"? It seems a significant part of responsible parenting is to teach kids that there are limits to their behavior, that they are not "special", that we all have to meet certain standards of behavior to have harmony in our lives.

I don't understand the whole "unconditional love" thing. What's that all about? In your opinion, is there such a thing? What would you do if confronted with either one of these situations, opposite ends of the continuum, but under the same umbrella?


Peace,


~Chani

In the halls of justice....

... all the justice is in the halls, as Lenny Bruce once said.

Did this stuff just start with OJ?

Not likely.

I got up this morning and heard that Paris Hilton has been fitted with an ankle bracelet and has been reassigned to home confinement. She was let out of jail because she whined and cried until her psychiatrist signed an order that she is "ill" and can't handle it. I'd like to know what medical condition justified her being let out early.

Sheesh! Home confinement in Bel Air! My heart is bleeding! I wonder if she has enough range on her ankle bracelet to walk her little dog on Bellagio Road!

You know, I'm the first one to consider psychological conditions and I'm especially sensitive to not traumatizing people. We all come with different capabilities in this world, things we can handle and things we can't. Some people simply can not handle certain life conditions. As one who is extremely environmentally sensitive (can't stand lights, noise, etc), I probably bend too much in the direction of honoring personal psychological needs.

The thing is that I am not partial to rich people.

Is jail not traumatizing for young Black women from Watts?

I've often believed that if we wait long enough, the truth usually comes out. The double-tiered system of justice is out on the table right now. It's no longer hidden. It's no longer talked about behind hands. It's in our faces. This just smells!

And will it change? Probably not.

What do you think? How should the American people respond to this?


Peace,

~Chani

(Note: If these posts are getting boring as hell, would someone tell me? I'm floundering a bit here and hate to think I'm boring the spit out of everyone. It's hard to be scintillating every day, isn't it? LOL I think I might have to go steal some memes. :)

Is Paris Burning?

As much as I hate to raise the issue of this particular bit of cultural pollution, I've been watching the story with a bit of interest. Not much, mind you.. but it's marginally interesting background noise.

It's pathetic to watch this woman having a major meltdown, trying to petition the governor to get out of her 45-day sentence.

Small wonder she's panicking! I seriously doubt she has the internal resources to deal with a situation like that.

When I was a kid, I saw a lot of this. In fact, we experienced it in my own family. My brother was caught in Glendale with marijuana in 1967. (It was a big deal then.) Attorneys were hired. Phone calls were made. He got a fine and probation for something most people would have suffered more severe consequences.

Where Paris Hilton actually lives, I have no idea. If I'm not mistaken, she lives in Brentwood which is a very exclusive neighborhood. She was raised in the very insular community of Bel Air. Regardless of that, given her mother's behavior in the courtroom, I'd say Paris was not raised with any concept of how to survive in the world, no matter where she lives. She definitely wasn't raised with any concept of accountability.

I have reservations about someone like Paris Hilton or any other young person from similar backgrounds going into the Lynwood jail. That is a rough place! For those not familiar with the Los Angeles area, Lynwood is a rather tough part of the region, not far from Watts, Paramount and Compton.

I do believe her life would be at risk.

While she needs to be punished and she needs to be confined for those 45 days, it doesn't seem wise to put her in a jail where she would be seriously at risk. She needs to suffer her punishment in an environment where she will be taught a lesson but not traumatized. It needs to scare hell out of her but not to the extent that her life or her mental health would possibly be permanently damaged.

That would be cruel and unusual, in my opinion. Surely there is another facility in the Los Angeles area that can take her.


Peace,


~Chani