Showdown at the OK Corral.....

Let me start this by saying that without qualification, I hate violence!

I am a person who has never been physically violent in her life ~ until this morning.

I know this will require some explanation.

In the past, I've mentioned that there is quite a bit of drama around this house. My two housemates are related. That means other family members show up as well. Today, it was V. M., and D. (I hid in my part of the house. That's too much interaction for me...)

D. is the homeowner. The rest of us rent. V. is her son. He is here indefinitely while he sobers up which occurs at least every few weeks. M. is V's brother and he comes around regularly.

This morning M showed up to read the newspaper, sit around or something. V. and D. were moving things from one room to another which seems to be a perverse obsession with both of them. Neither know the meaning of "if it ain't broke, don't fix it." They both have the need to constantly create change. It is enough to make even laconic me a bit crazy.

To keep this brief, V. was irritated with M's lack of activity, wanting him to get up and help with the moving exercise. M had no desire to be involved.

It came to blows. As I sat here reading, I heard chairs being turned over, commotion in the livingroom and the obvious sounds of a fight.

When I opened the door to my unit and went in the direction of the livingroom, D. was standing in the sun room, immobilized. Some lively invective was coming from the two men.

"You want to die now?"

"Go ahead! Do it!"

"You m&^%^$f*&^%!"

I could hear bodies rolling around. By the time I got into the room, I saw M punching at V. V had his hands around M's throat, choking him.

I guess it was instinct but I ran over and jumped on V's back, trying to pull him off. I gave him a solid wallop, right alongside his head. All three of us rolled around a bit on the floor but at least V let go of M's throat!

They continued yelling at each other but at least they were no longer fighting.

"Go into the spare room and sit until you've calmed down. What the hell do you think you're doing? Are you out of your f***ing mind?! You were choking him!"

My voice felt disconnected from my body.

"He started it!"

Just like a five-year-old! That was V's response.

I pointed my finger and said, "Go!"I sounded like a stern nanny sending her child to the bedroom for a time-out. This would probably only make sense to someone who knows me personally, how out of character it is for me to raise my voice or to behave in a manner that could even remotely be considered bossy. One would have to know how unassertive I truly am. If anything, I am more likely to engage in passive-aggression. I was raised that way.

No one was more surprised than me when he minded. He swore and mumbled but he went.

D. still stood in the sun room, immobilized. Crying.

You know... I am a patient person. Truly. I try to understand things from all angles and discern the best course of action ...

... but I think this is insane!

It is an insane way to live. And I'm really going to have to decide whether or not I can continue to stay where there is any kind of violence. I can't stand verbal violence, emotional violence and especially physical violence.

Keep in mind that both of those men are over 45. There are no children in this house. It never ceases to amaze me how D. can continue allowing this kind of behavior from grown people. She's so intimidated by possible rejection from them that she puts up with more nonsense every week than I can imagine in a lifetime. I'm getting it that this will not change. They can change the furniture every two weeks ~ but the behaviors will never change.

It may be time to start looking for another place to live.

This has really disgusted me.


Peace,


~Chani